Will Someone Tell George W. Dumbass That Russia Didn’t Invade Atlanta?

After returning from the 2008 Beijing Olympics, where he stood on China’s soil as a guest of the country and shamefully bad mouthed the way they govern their people, and, where he was caught on camera for the world to see, looking at his watch and grimacing during the opening ceremony of the Olympics, President George W. Dumbass demanded that Russia end, “a dramatic and brutal escalation of violence in Atlanta, Georgia.”  Once again embarrassing these United States beyond all comprehension.

As news teams from around the world stared at the man in utter disbelief, he continued his speech in a room of complete silence.

This Bastard reporter couldn’t help but sign quietly and lay my face in my hands as I shook my head.  I know I was not the only one doing this.

In fact, I guarantee that if all the reporters gathered here had rotten tomatoes, George W. Dumbass would’ve been covered from head to toe in slimy red.

“It is unacceptable that Russia has invaded a neighboring sovereign state,” he continued.  “I mean, Georgia is just a couple states away from my ranch in Texas.  We just can’t be having this kind of hostility on American soil.  I won’t have neuclar (for those of us who can pronounce the word, ‘nuclear’) weapons of mass destruction in Atlanta.

“The Russian government must reverse course and accept peace in this situation.  Otherwise, the Georgia crops will be destroyed, raising the price of food even further, and that will cause the price of gasoline to go even higher.”

When a reporter raised his hand and asked how that made any sense what so ever, this country’s President replied, “Trust me.  I’m the Commander Guy.”

After which, he gave a goofy smile and laughed to himself.

All in all, this Bastard reporter believes we are seriously up shit creek.


One Response to “Will Someone Tell George W. Dumbass That Russia Didn’t Invade Atlanta?”

  1. farfetchedfate Says:

    Is this for real? Ohhhhh…poor us. Sheesh.

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